From the recording Tea Pot Lady

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A Pentecostal family living out West Texas way
Was having a prayer meeting on a hot and holy day
When Preacher Sammy cried out
“My children shed your sundries!
God has just revealed to me that Satan loves our undies!”

The choir leader shrieked agreement
With her well-trained lungs
Her polyseter pantsuit
Had just spoke to her in tongues
Another family member added to the mass distress
His Red Wing Boots had just declared
They longed to be a dress!

For Satan’s in our laundry
And Satan’s in our hearts
And Satan’s in the very jeans
We purchased at Walmart
Friends let’s build a fire
Burn clothes and shoes as well
We’ll still our sneakers wagging tongues
Consign their soles to hell!

“God has said to flee from Texas
Satan’s on the way!”
So said Preacher Sammy on that hot and holy day.
His family crammed into a caddy
Drove for Galveston
Shedding clothing all the way
And seeking salvation

For Satan’s in our checkbooks
And Satan’s in out ties
And Satan’s in those garters holding hose up on our thighs
We’ll wander naked to the East
Singing hymns and praying
Our socks may have been holy but their laughter was dismaying.

They reached Louisiana
Where a cop stopped them for speeding
The cop called reinforcements
Preacher Sammy fled the scene
He drove the car into a tree
The congregation scattered
Forty naked panicked feet!
Twenty pure hearts shattered!

Now Sammy’s facing charges
For resisiting his arrest
His family’s still at large
Through the woods they roam undressed
On still nights you can hear them wailing out their plainvive cries
“Oh the brambles!”
“Oh the stickers!”
“Oh the goosebumps on our thighs!”

But Satan had our laundry
And Satan had our hearts
And Satan had the very jeans
We purchased at Walmart
And now we’re pure and spotless
In souls if not in bods
Out clothes belong to Satan
But our buns belong to God!

Copyright Marilyn Rucker Norrod